Marriage VS Destructive Criticism.

Our words matter. In fact, the Bible assigns them life or death power. But it is not really our organ (tongue) that speaks: it is our heart in our mouth. “A good man brings good things out of the good stored up in him, and an evil man brings evil things out of the evil stored up in him” (Matthew 12:35-37). Our words reveal the nature of our heart.

We may not realize, but our words are like a sharp sword. There are two kinds of words Christians use as ammunition in their families: worldly, foolish words, or gospel, fighting words. Foolish words mimic the sounds and image of the devil: lies, slander, gossip, criticism, flattery. They tear down, they burn holes in our hearts, they stint the growth of our husbands and children. Fighting words, on the other hand, are the words of the gospel. That holy ammunition we have in Jesus’ words. The Word of God is our sword in the fight against the devil and all the principalities of this world. Gospel words seek to build up our homes through their truth and holiness. They carry the good news of the cross to the hearts and minds of our husbands and children. How are you using your sword in your home? 

God’s Word is our holy sword in the spiritual warfare. Too often, as wives and mothers, we trade the sword (the Bible) for a smart phone (distractions), and abdicate our roles of protecting and building up our family. We stop carrying God’s Word in our hands, and allow our eyes to feast on daily distractions instead. Uncle Screwtape, a demon, from C.S. Lewis’ “The Screwtape Letters,” said: “It is funny how mortals always picture us as putting things into their minds: in reality our best work is done by keeping things out.” Distractions keep godly things out of our mind. Distraction from the gospel allows foolishness to grow through our heart, straight in our mouth, and out into the inner-hood of the ones we love. Is your phone distracting you from the people and children in your home? Is it a source of dripping complaints in your life?

A joyful woman arms herself with the gospel fighting words. She wises up in the fight from the source of all wisdom: the Bible. A wise woman who concerns herself with building up her husband and children, doesn’t have time to preoccupy herself with tearing down her own, or another’s. She keeps her lips under God’s lock as she prayerfully asks: “Set a guard, O Lord, over my mouth; keep watch over the door of my lips!” (Psalm 141:3)

Are there any changes you need to make this very day in your speech towards your husband and children? Are your words building your family up, or tearing them down?